Happy Again

so i don't know if i had told you all but me and my boyfriend went on what seemed like a break, i was scared i thought we broke up. but we didn't and you know what, as much as he frustrates me and annoys me and i swear sometimes i want to just throw something at him, he also always tells me i can do anything i put my mind to. I talked with him today and we talked and solved our fight but i just saw a whole different side of him today. you see he comes from a well-off family, and i always thought that he was given things by his parents but he wasn't he worked for everything he has. we talked for over four hours today and he shared with me his worry about weather or not he will make it, just like me hes scared of what will come of him. he too has payment worries and doubts and fears. hes never showed me this side of him before. But now I just have way more respect for him and just see things differently. all those times he was telling me about keeping my head up and how to fix things it was all from his experience. I love him soo much, and despite everything I have been through in the past 5 months I can truly say I have turned a new page.

unbelievable!

i don't understand. when my sister lies to the parents about things going on in her life i stick by her, even if it means that i too end up lying. but then i ask for the same courtesy and she gets mad. I have decided to move back to my moms. its a difficult thing for me to do because as i said before no one thinks i should, but my sister made the decision even worse for me. i got an acceptance to a school by my dads which is great but i already made a payment to the school at my moms. I don't really feel like my mom even wants me here but this school by her house is amazing and i already have a few books and credits to the course I am taking so it would be easier for me.My sister opened my mail without my permission read my mail and told my mom about the acceptance. And now my mom has been acting strange like shes waiting for me to tell her okay never mind i am not moving. But I love this school!! so now my sister is all mad at me and telling me i am a horrible person and breaking my dads heart and all this crap. like how dare she talk about these things. she shouldn't have even opened my mail and yes i am moving but to go to school and a great school she should be happy for me. no one is happy for me then she ends with "great living with you" like are you kidding me!!! i understand she is mad but im trying to get an education!!! why would she do this and make me feel so horrible. I am doing this and no i dont care how people feel because at this point its back to thinking about me

changes changes changes

things change all the time at every minute of everyday. its hard to understand how or why things work. if connections will ever be made between two people or even if the path you are taking is the right one. sometimes you go back and erase all the things that have happened so you can start a new. i decided i want to be back at my moms. not because i don't like my dad i love him and my step mom too i love everything there, but I want to go back to school and the only acceptance i got was to the school closest to my moms. Also yes i do miss my mom a bit too but who wouldn't? i just wish that the decisions i made didn't have to involve child support. i wish my parents kept those things to themselves and the focus was on me going to school not weather or not my father will be paying money to my mother. this is the reason why if i ever have a child i am doing it right. people don't realize what a huge impact split parents have on kids. its like you can get this amazing accomplishment and it just isn't seen because the issue of money is always first. i just wanted to go to school and for my parents to actually show joy that i am going back to school. its like no matter what i do no one is happy, so i might as well do what will make me happy. and of course i think if others feelings but sometimes you just have to do what you have to do. i love my family but sometimes i just rather be on my own. its hard living a life with split parents.